Eugie Foster (eugie) wrote,
Eugie Foster

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In praise of GI cocktails

Had a very, very bad day yesterday. Apparently, the monsters that had invaded my GI system were lying in wait, lulling me into a false sense of complacency. Okay, I probably shouldn't have had the cold pizza and the orange soda for breakfast, but it's not like I haven't done stuff like that before with no ill effects. Felt like a herd of camels was standing on my stomach while a tiny demon with razor-edged claws tried to tear its way out of my stomach lining. This happens to me occasionally. It's rare, and usually I can head it off with a determined application of antacids early on--it's like a migraine of the stomach--but this time I couldn't or I acted too slowly. I'm cursed by really crappy gastro-intestinal genes. Both my parents have the most appallingly delicate stomachs. My mother gets motion sick if she looks at a boat--I'm not exaggerating--and my father is prone to ulcers. Anyway, the last time this happened (many years ago) I ended up in the ER after an ambulance ride. It's the kind of pain that leaves you writhing on the bed, twisting and contorting from pain, when you wish someone would slug you, hard, in the head, so you could pass out.

Had my follow-up with my "behavioral health" doctor and almost canceled since I was in so much pain, but I figured, he's an MD after all, he can prescribe something, right? Last time, all I needed was a GI cocktail. I got Matthew to drive me in, since I didn't think I could manage it. My poor hubby was distraught, didn't know what to do but hated seeing me in so much pain. Let me just say again, that I am really unimpressed by my psychiatrist. He was unable to prescribe me anything, as he wasn't that sort of doctor. He suggested I go to the ER or the Adult Medicine department on the floor above, which is what I did. But exactly what sort of medical degree does he have that he couldn't prescribe me or ask a nurse to mix me up a bit of Lidocaine and Donnatal in a Mylanta infusion?

The Adult Medicine receptionist was a bit confused as to what to do with a walk-in since I didn't have an appointment. She kept trying to tell me that "you can't see a doctor because you didn't schedule an appointment" and I told her, "yes, I know I don't have an appointment, but I was here for a follow-up appointment and I just want to see a nurse or physician's assistant who can give me something for the pain since my alternative is to go to the ER. I'm here now, and in a LOT of pain." This dialogue was repeated several times (while I'm barely able to keep myself from doubling over in pain) until finally she stuck me into the waiting queue. An agonizing time later, I got to see a triage nurse who tched at my breakfast choice and checked my vitals before finally getting me the GI cocktail I needed. Nice take-away-my-pain woman. Nice. *pets*

I fell into blessed sleep once the cocktail took effect. My ordeal left me shaky, stomach-wise. Had a bowl of plain, white rice for dinner, and then a bit of pasta several hours later when I started feeling hungry. My insides are making gurgling noises now, but it's so much better than the alternative.

For my own future reference, a GI cocktail consists of:

10 ml of Viscous Lidocaine
10 ml of Donnatal
30 ml of Maalox/Mylanta

I wonder if I would have been able to get faster treatment if I'd been able to ask specifically for it. When I was talking to my psychiatrist, I wanted to tell him "I just need this, dammit" but it had been so long since I'd been in the ER, I couldn't remember what they'd given me, although I knew it was pretty straightforward. Now I'll have the recipe. Wish I could get Lidocaine and Donnatal OTC so I could quell the pain as fast as possible next time.


Writing Stuff

I'm excusing myself from Club 100 yesterday. Gut-twisting agony is not a good writing productivity aid.

I did, however, sign up to be a mentor for Absynthe Muse because I want to do some paying-it-forward, and I wish I would've had a writing mentor when I was younger. I might have stuck with it then if I'd had an experienced pro to encourage and steer my craft, and walk me through the process of marketing.
Tags: medical

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